To Choke an Ocean

Project Gutenberg is a massive digital library of public domain works. Its archives contain not merely novels, but also numerous short stories from magazines with adjectives like “Amazing”, “Thrilling”, “Startling” and “Wondrous” in their titles. I’m making my way through its vast catalogue of these speculative fiction works. Today, I’ll be looking at “To Choke an Ocean” by Jesse F. Bone, published in If World of Science Fiction in 1960.

Gutenberg Link

To Choke an Ocean

SPOILERS BELOW

“To Choke an Ocean” begins with a merchant caught in customs on the planet Niobe complaining about what he sees as excessive regulations on imports. The protagonist, Lanceford, tells the story of how he once nearly destroyed the entire planet’s ecosystem by importing oysters, leading to the current strict rules.

This was a decent story. It was a good illustration of the dangers posed by invasive species being introduced to new ecologies, the threat posed by greed to the environment, and safety regulations being the product of bitter experience. My biggest gripe is that it ends on a bad pun; but I think I can forgive it that.

Final Rating: 3/5

Monster World #1: Monster World

Confused, mind bruised, it seeps out, it seeps out, it seeps out. Face down, home town looks so grey, so grey, so grey. Convexed, you bend, twist and shout, and shout, and shout. Stand up, brush off, get moving, get moving, get moving. Let’s roll the cameras on Monster World, by Philip Kim, Steve Niles, and Piotr Kowalski.

Synopsis:

Something sinister is lurking behind the cameras of world-famous World Studios, and it may not be human. When Detective Henry Barrymore is approached by a mysterious woman to investigate her husband’s disappearance, he hardly expects to be embroiled in the workings of a mysterious cult who seem to have control over movie monsters. It’s Casablanca meets Crowley in this supernatural noir miniseries!

Source: Goodreads

SPOILERS BELOW

Monster World is about Henry Barrymore, a private detective who is hired to investigate the disappearance of the head of a successful movie studio. Turns out the studio’s success was due to a dark pact with a cult lead by an evil magician who uses his power to enslave monsters. The studio head only wanted to use them to save on makeup costs, but the cult has grander and more dastardly plans, and now it’s up to Henry to stop them.

This series was decent. I mean, the appearance of the monsters was kind of cheesy, and the action scenes were all pretty stiff; but you can call that a homage to early Hollywood monster movies. At least it told a complete and satisfying story. I don’t know, maybe it’s because I’m a sucker for the noir aesthetic, or because I’m reading it right after comics that I found completely repellent like Dream Maiden Megan or that completely failed at basic story structure like Gunsuits Alix, but I’m willing to give its flaws a pass. It may not be all that great by most metrics, by I enjoyed reading it, and that’s what really matters.

Monster World #1-4 have not been collected so far as I’ve been able to find.

Final Rating: 3/5

Noble Redman

Project Gutenberg is a massive digital library of public domain works. Its archives contain not merely novels, but also numerous short stories from magazines with adjectives like “Amazing”, “Thrilling”, “Startling” and “Wondrous” in their titles. I’m making my way through its vast catalogue of these speculative fiction works. Today, I’ll be looking at “Noble Redman” by Jesse F. Bone, published in Amazing Science Fiction Stories in 1960.

Gutenberg Link

Noble Redman

SPOILERS BELOW

“Noble Redman” sees Cyril, a shady character on Mars, meet Noble Redman, a red-skinned man (not a racial slur; his skin is literally bright red), who wins a lot of money gambling and needs to leave in a hurry before the sore losers decide to take their money back by force. Noble is from the radioactive ruins of Earth, which are kept quarantined by the Galactic Patrol; he was sent on a mission to steal technology so his people could break the quarantine. His biggest advantage is that the radiation has given his people psychic powers. Cyril finds himself torn between his fear of what Earth psychics might be capable of should they escape quarantine and his greed for what they might offer him.

This was a decent story about an immoral man facing a moral dilemma. Cyril might be a scumbag, but he was at least an interesting character to follow as he tried to figure out where his self-interest lay. Overall, I liked it.

Final Rating: 3/5

Dungeon Crawler Carl #2: Carl’s Doomsday Scenario

If you hold a cat by the tail, you learn things you cannot learn any other way. Let’s cancel the apocalypse with Carl’s Doomsday Scenario, by Matt Dinniman.

Synopsis:

“The training levels have concluded. Now the games may truly begin.”

The ratings and views are off the chart. The fans just can’t get enough. The dungeon gets more dangerous each day. But in a grinder designed to chew up and spit out crawlers by the millions, Carl and Princess Donut need to work harder than ever just to survive.

They call it the Over City. A sprawling, once-thriving metropolis devastated by a mysterious calamity. But these streets are far from abandoned. An undead circus trawls the ruins. Murdered prostitutes rain from the sky. An ancient spell is finally ready to reveal its dark purpose.

Carl still has no pants.

They call it Dungeon Crawler World. For Carl and Donut, it’s anything but a game.

Source: Goodreads

SPOILERS BELOW

The first Dungeon Crawler Carl book concluded with Carl and Princess Donut reaching the third floor, where they would make their race and class selections. Now a Primal Compensated Anarchist and a Cat Former Child Star, they enter the first open-world level of the dungeon. It’s no longer a hack-and-slash through endless monster-filled corridors; this is a realm of villages filled with NPC merchants, unstoppable town guards, and Quests that require investigation rather than just mindlessly killing everything they encounter. Carl and Princess Donut being Carl and Princess Donut, though, it still ends with a really big explosion. Would you expect anything else?

While the quests were an interesting way to add to the narrative of the dungeon crawl, and there’s more development of the politics behind the show with the Skull Empire’s reckless actions causing a rift in a long-standing alliance and the AI causing a nasty legal fight by attempting to go so Monty Haul with loot that it would have bankrupted the Borant Corporation had they not overruled it, the thing that most interested me about this book was the expansion of the party. While the first book had the people from the retirement home, they were treated like civilians that Carl and Donut had to protect rather than active contributing compatriots; and Mongo is a pet rather than a person. Now, however, Mordecai has become officially attached to them as Princess Donut’s manager as a perk of the Former Child Star class, and Doppleganger Monster Truck Driver Katia has also joined The Royal Court of Princess Donut after being separated from Brynhild’s Daughters. The character interactions have always been a highlight of this series, and I’m looking forward to seeing what these additions bring to the team dynamic. (Particularly Katia; Mordecai appeared enough as their tutorial guide for me to get a good sense of his character, but Katia only joins near the end of this book, so she hasn’t gotten much spotlight yet).

The print version of the book also contains the continuation of “Behind the Scenes at the Pineapple Cabaret” at the end. I didn’t find this installment to be as intriguing as the first, because it’s revealed that the mobs being saved from the floor collapse wasn’t a glitch in the system – it was part of the standard protocol for constructing the 17th floor of the dungeon, which is completely pointless because no crawler has ever beaten the 13th floor, and most seasons don’t even go past 9 or 10. An unanticipated rebellion against the cruel and unjust system by the lowliest of exploited peons is an interesting premise; the pointless continued machinations of the system are not.

But the short story aside, this was another excellent book, and the Dungeon Crawler Carl series remains exceptionally good.

Final Rating: 5/5

A Question of Courage

Project Gutenberg is a massive digital library of public domain works. Its archives contain not merely novels, but also numerous short stories from magazines with adjectives like “Amazing”, “Thrilling”, “Startling” and “Wondrous” in their titles. I’m making my way through its vast catalogue of these speculative fiction works. Today, I’ll be looking at “A Question of Courage” by Jesse F. Bone, published in Amazing Stories in 1960.

Gutenberg Link

A Question of Courage

SPOILERS BELOW

“A Question of Courage” follows Lt. Thomas Marsden, who is posted on the spaceship Lachesis while humanity is at war. The crew hates the ship’s extremely by-the-book captain, who they regard as a coward denying them glory in battle. Then they get into an actual fight, and the captain sacrifices his life to save his crew. Marsden realizes he was never a coward – rather, he understood the value of human life, and wanted to protect his crew from the reckless boldness displayed by other captains.

This was a very solid sci-fi story. There’s a good action scene with the fight at the end, and Marsden’s gradual re-evaluation of his captain’s character gives the story a strong emotional arc. All in all, I enjoyed it.

Final Rating: 4/5

Gunsuits #0: Gunsuits Alix

Mummified my teenage dreams. No, it’s nothing wrong with me. The kids are all wrong, the stories are off. Heavy metal broke my heart. Let’s suit up for Gunsuits Alix, by Philip Kim, Holly Interlandi, and Dennis Calero

Synopsis:

You’ve read Paul Tobin and PJ Holden’s first Gunsuits adventure, starring Cassandra “Potts” Potter and thousands of universes. Now learn the origin of the war she was fighting: a very different reality, where Lieutenant Reegan Alexis is compromised in battle against a bio-mech until Walter Rice puts her back together – with a few extra enhancements! It’s Lovecraft meets Robotech in this special oversized “zero issue”!

Source: Goodreads

SPOILERS BELOW

Gunsuits Alix is a special zero issue for the Gunsuits series. A number zero issue usually indicates a prequel; however, given that it takes place in a completely different reality than the one the main series follows, its placement in the timeline is kind of irrelevant. Our protagonist this time is Reegan “Alix” Alexis, who manages to kill a bio-mech but is torn in half at the waist in the process. She’s rescued by a mad scientist, Dr. Walter Rice, who grafts bionic legs reverse-engineered from alien technology on her. He promises that they will make her stronger and more capable of fighting the bio-mechs than anyone else…but then the story ends before we actually see her, you know, fight.

This zero issue is kind of a failure. As a supplement to “learn the origin of the war she was fighting”, as promised by the synopsis, it’s a failure because, well, we already learned that in the original series; Dr. Rice just repeats a bunch of exposition we already heard. As a prequel, it’s a failure because it doesn’t connect in any way to the story told by the main series – anyone picking up Gunsuits hoping to see the story of Alix continued is in for a disappointment. As a stand-alone, it’s a failure because it sets Alix up with these new modified legs and custom exo-suit, only to end before the actually gets the opportunity to use any of it. In short, Gunsuits Alix fails to deliver in pretty much every way. The art was pretty, I guess? It has that going for it, at least.

Final Rating: 2/5

A Prize for Edie

Project Gutenberg is a massive digital library of public domain works. Its archives contain not merely novels, but also numerous short stories from magazines with adjectives like “Amazing”, “Thrilling”, “Startling” and “Wondrous” in their titles. I’m making my way through its vast catalogue of these speculative fiction works. Today, I’ll be looking at “A Prize for Eddie” by Jessie F. Bone, published in Analog Science Fact and Fiction in 1961.

Gutenberg Link

A Prize for Edie

SPOILERS BELOW

“A Prize for Edie” sees the Nobel committee decide to award a prize to Edie, who discovered a cure for cancer. However, Edie turns out to be not a person, but a computer. After much hemming and hawing, they decide to go through with it.

There really wasn’t much content to this story; the twist that Edie is a computer rather than a person is really the whole point of it. Once the reveal is made, it doesn’t really go anywhere or do anything with it. As such, I didn’t find it that interesting.

Final Rating: 2/5

Dungeon Crawler Carl #1: Dungeon Crawler Carl

Rome will exist as long as the Coliseum does; when the Coliseum falls, so will Rome; when Rome falls, so will the world. Let’s gear up for Dungeon Crawler Carl, by Matt Dinniman.

Synopsis:

The apocalypse will be televised!

A man. His ex-girlfriend’s cat. A sadistic game show unlike anything in the universe: a dungeon crawl where survival depends on killing your prey in the most entertaining way possible.

In a flash, every human-erected construction on Earth—from Buckingham Palace to the tiniest of sheds—collapses in a heap, sinking into the ground.

The buildings and all the people inside have all been atomized and transformed into the dungeon: an 18-level labyrinth filled with traps, monsters, and loot. A dungeon so enormous, it circles the entire globe.

Only a few dare venture inside. But once you’re in, you can’t get out. And what’s worse, each level has a time limit. You have but days to find a staircase to the next level down, or it’s game over. In this game, it’s not about your strength or your dexterity. It’s about your followers, your views. Your clout. It’s about building an audience and killing those goblins with style.

You can’t just survive here. You gotta survive big.

You gotta fight with vigor, with excitement. You gotta make them stand up and cheer. And if you do have that “it” factor, you may just find yourself with a following. That’s the only way to truly survive in this game—with the help of the loot boxes dropped upon you by the generous benefactors watching from across the galaxy.

They call it Dungeon Crawler World. But for Carl, it’s anything but a game.

Source: Goodreads

SPOILERS BELOW

In Dungeon Crawler Carl, Earth is taken over by an alien corporation that turns it into a galactically televised gameshow. The human population is forced to run through a D&D-style fantasy dungeon full of monsters and traps, aided by a stat system that grant them superhuman abilities and “magic” items that boost their capabilities, all overseen by an omniscient AI designed to tweak the enemy encounters and loot drops for maximum entertainment value. If a dungeon crawler can make it through all 18 levels, they’ll win back the planet – too bad nobody in galactic history has ever gotten farther than level 13.

This book belongs to a genre called LitRPG, which faithfully reproduces roleplaying game conventions like stats, random encounters, treasure drops, and so on (with varying amounts of in-universe justification, depending on the series). It’s not a very well-respected genre due to the large number of low-quality isekai power fantasies clogging it up; but as you might guess if you read my reviews of the So I’m a Spider, So What? series, I’m an absolute sucker for it if executed well. And Dungeon Crawler Carl is executed very, very well.

There are a number of ingredients to the magic formula that makes it such a success. Top of the list, of course, would be the characters. Hapless crawler Carl and his pampered feline companion Princess Donut the Queen Anne Chonk make the perfect odd couple bickering buddy duo; and whether getting into outrageous death-defying antics in the dungeon or bantering with talk show hosts in the between-floor interviews, I just can’t get enough of them. Then there’s the mixture of action and comedy: the book delivers not only spellbinding fight sequences against the monsters of the dungeon, but also excellent humor in the form of the achievements and item descriptions our heroes encounter. And, yes, there’s of course that Pavlovian number-go-up good feeling that Skinner Box games make so effectively exploit and which the best LitRPGs find a way to make work in non-interactive text form: seeing what skills our protagonists acquire and how they make use of them, what off-the-wall exploits they can come up with to overcome foes with bigger numbers.

Another thing the book has going for it is the setting. While we only get a few brief glimpses behind the scenes in this first novel, it’s clear that this is not one of those low-effort LitRPGs that use the default RPG setting because they expect the audience to be familiar with it and put no further thought into things. There are powerful political and economic machinations at play behind the game: an ultranationalist faction takeover in the government of the race running the show. A corporation on the edge of bankruptcy counting on profits from the show to bail them out, while creditors loom ominously over their shoulders. Former dungeon crawlers from other worlds who bought their way into the system to stay alive, and rich alien assholes who use the game to play out their power fantasies. All these different factions with differing incentives on whether they want the game to wrap up quick or drag on long, have a higher lethality or see more competitors get farther, which contestants they can sponsor to make them a profit or embarrass their rivals. And caught in the middle of it all, the crawlers trying to navigate the web of these competing alien interests and figure out the best strategy to become popular with viewers and profitable to corporate sponsors so that they’ll be more valuable alive than dead; anything to make the AI running the show decide to skew the RNG in their favor and give them the slightest bit better of a chance of surviving to the next level.

Finally, I need to mention the exclusive bonus story “Backstage at the Pineapple Cabaret” included in the print edition of this volume, which features a bunch of minor goblin minions fed up with their role as disposable trash mobs for the crawlers to slaughter staging a rebellion against their corporate overlords, assisted by the sympathetic AI. This is a compelling premise that could easily sustain an entire series on its own, and made for an excellent coda to the book.

Dungeon Crawler Carl is truly exceptional. I am more enthusiastic about this story than I can recall being for a series in a long time, and plan to dive into the remaining installments right away.

Final Rating: 5/5

Pandemic

Project Gutenberg is a massive digital library of public domain works. Its archives contain not merely novels, but also numerous short stories from magazines with adjectives like “Amazing”, “Thrilling”, “Startling” and “Wondrous” in their titles. I’m making my way through its vast catalogue of these speculative fiction works. Today, I’ll be looking at “Pandemic” by Jesse F. Bone, published in Analog Science Fact and Fiction in 1962.

Gutenberg Link

Pandemic

SPOILERS BELOW

In “Pandemic”, a viral plague called Thurston’s Disease is ravaging the world. Marty Barton, a nurse, joins Dr. Walter Kramer at a lab researching the disease in hopes of finding a curse. This is a dangerous job, as due to the disease’s high contagiousness, many who work with it end up dying of it. Our protagonists, however, succeed in finding a cure – heavy smoking. I, uh, may have some bad news for you…

I guess this was supposed to be ironic? Like, smoking is unhealthy, but now it’s the only way to survive the plague? I don’t know, it didn’t really work for me. Call this one a miss.

Final Rating: 2/5

Gunsuits #1: Gunsuits

I’m insane but on my toes. I could keep the world balanced on my nose. I had a slumber party with all my foes Now I wear them like a badge of honor on my clothes. If I’m crazy, I’m on my own. If I’m waiting, it’s on my throne. If I sound lazy, just ignore my tone. Let’s travel two thousand kilometers to Gunsuits, by Paul Tobin, P.J. Holden, and Diego Rodríguez.

Synopsis:

Soldiers are crowded around screens watching for victory. No, it’s not a news broadcast: each of the screens shows a different world, a different reality, and a different way for a battle to play out between a gunsuit containing Cassandra “Potts” Potter and massive biomechanical monsters. These monsters have come through wormholes all over the globe from an alternate evolutionary timeline. Time after time Potts watches herself die, until miraculously one day the crew discovers a sequence where she stabs a monster with a giant spike, and wins.

Potts immediately mans her mech and dives through a portal to the corresponding world, where she almost loses a battle against a monster before her alternate self saves her via spike. They are two different versions of the same woman, brought to their respective positions from years of evolution and personal choices. Potts’ other self introduces her to a crew called the Tombstones, who are in the slightly earlier stages of defending their base from the tentacled bio-mechs and actually possess a refridgerator full of beer. Potts might be optimistic for the first time in years…

… until a new kind of bio-mech appears. One smaller than a cockroach but completely lethal. And swarms of them are about to storm the base. Is this new universe the solution, or just another path to destruction?

Source: Goodreads

SPOILERS BELOW

In Gunsuits, humanity is searching for a way to fight giant bio-mech monsters that are invading through wormholes from an alternate timeline. Rather than engaging the monsters themselves, which they don’t have the resources or manpower for, they’re looking through the wormholes into other alternate timelines where humanity is fighting the bio-mechs, in the hopes that one of the many worlds will stumble on a successful strategy. After watching thousands of alternate versions of herself die to bio-mechs, mech pilot Cassandra Potter finally sees one emerge victorious. She travels through a wormhole to that world, believing that the bio-mechs can be defeated and the wormholes closed from there. (Closing the wormhole on one world will close them on all worlds, because… uh… wibbly-wobbly timey-wimey?)

This series had a really good premise: robot suits versus bio-mechs across multiple parallel worlds. Unfortunately, the execution was kind of lacking. For one thing, the rules for how this parallel dimension stuff works didn’t make much sense. Like, why would defeating the invaders in one world defeat them in every world? Are all the monsters coming from one single timeline? That doesn’t seem like it’d work – it’d mean that they’re fighting on a hundred thousand different fronts simultaneously. Plus, the reason the timeline Potts finds is having more success against the invaders is because the attack bio-mechs are less advanced in that universe, suggesting they come from a different timeline than the ones attacking her home universe. In the end, it just comes down to some vague “well, the multiverse will heal itself if given a chance, and beating them once, anywhere, will give it that chance, probably, I guess”, which doesn’t feel real solid. Then there’s stuff like Potts saying that if two of the same person are in the same timeline, one of them will eventually fade out of existence – except we never see it happen, or even start to happen, so why even bring it up? In Into the Spider-Verse something similar is used to create a ticking clock for the Spider-Men to fix the situation; but here, the main ticking clock is more and stronger bio-mechs coming through the wormholes, with the fading never becoming an issue. Then there’s the contrivance of Potts encountering a version of herself from the invading universe piloting a bio-mech – despite the fact that the timelines are said to have diverged in early hominid times, meaning that after so many generations there should no longer be any exact duplicates due to how different the worlds are. (If this was the only issue, I might’ve been able to overlook it, as the hero-meets-evil-alternate-self trope occurs in many parallel-world stories and you just kinda have to go with it; but my suspension of disbelief has already been stretched past the breaking point).

The most egregious problem, however, is the ending; or should I say, lack of ending. The Potts we followed for these four issues fails and dies, and then we get a cliffhanger suggesting that another Potts from another timeline was watching her and is now going to pick up the fight. Based on the issue #0 comic describing this as the “first Gunsuits adventure”, I get the sense it was supposed to be a franchise-launcher. If so, however, it doesn’t seem to have worked out, as ten years have passed with no follow-up, so we’re just left with this disappointing non-ending. To be continued… never. You couldn’t have given Potts the win and had her close the wormhole? You could’ve always had the bad guys reopen it if the series proved popular enough for a sequel. Or, hey, here’s an idea: if you hadn’t done that stupid and nonsensical “beating them once anywhere beats them all everywhere” thing, you could have one world win in this story and then set later stories in other worlds that are still fighting. Sigh, what a waste.

Gunsuits #1-4 are collected in Gunsuits.

Final Rating: 2/5