Formula For Conquest

Project Gutenberg is a massive digital library of public domain works. Its archives contain not merely novels, but also numerous short stories from magazines with adjectives like “Amazing”, “Thrilling”, “Startling” and “Wondrous” in their titles. I’m making my way through its vast catalogue of these speculative fiction works. Today, I’ll be looking at “Formula For Conquest” by James R. Adams, published in Planet Stories in 1945.

Gutenberg Link

Formula For Conquest

SPOILERS BELOW

“Formula For Conquest” sees the scientist Twilken approach the soldier of fortune Mulhane with a formula he developed that he believes can tip the balance of power between the allied Inner Planets and the evil Jovians by super-accelerating the evolution of the Venusians and turning them into allies. However, they are overheard by a Jovian spy, who abducts them in order to use the scientist’s formula on the Jovians’ Plutonian allies instead. Twilken and Mulhane have to break free and stop the weapon Twilken intended to win the war from losing it for them instead.

Fundamentally, this story has the makings of an exciting caper. However, it had too many problems for me to be able to enjoy it. For one thing, (say it with me now), EVOLUTION DOES NOT WORK THAT WAY. Species evolve, not individuals; there is no pre-determined course that evolution follows that one can accelerate one’s way down, it is a reaction to environmental pressures; there is no reason to suppose evolution must be in the direction of greater intelligence (and thus ability to serve as an ally in an interplanetary war), as only one of the billions of extant species on Earth has evolved human intelligence (humans, obviously) despite all of them having evolved over the same period of time, etc., etc. And even if you’re tempted to give it a pass for that because 40’s pulp writers couldn’t be expected to know any better, the story also features another bugaboo of mine: phonetically transcribed accents. Nothing more quickly jars me out of a story than having the smooth progress of my reading slam to a halt as I’m forced to try and untangle what the author was attempting to convey with the misbegotten assemblage of letters vomited onto the page in only vague approximation of actual English.

“Formula For Conquest” ended up being a flop.

Final Rating: 2/5

Shangri-La (2016)

Now that you’ve found your paradise, this is your kingdom to command. You can go outside and polish your car or sit by the fire in your Shangri-La. Let’s fall out of love with Shangri-La, by Mathieu Bablet.

Synopsis:

A few hundred years in the future, humans have abandoned an uninhabitable Earth to live in a space station governed by the Tianzhu Corporation. Their needs and creature comforts are provided without questions, and everyone seems to be satisfied with this “perfect society”. But there are those who would trade that peaceful comfort for freedom…

As science reaches the verge of creating life from nothing, a blanket of shadowy secrets begin to unravel, revealing a conspiracy of carefully crafted manipulation that could usher in a new stage of evolution or signal the end of everything we know.

There is a dangerous difference between playing gods and becoming gods…

Source: Goodreads

SPOILERS BELOW

Shangri-La begins a million years ago, with our protagonist Scott dying on alien planet on the other side of the galaxy. We then jump to the present, where he works for the all-powerful Tianzhu Corporation in a dystopian future where Earth is uninhabitable, humanity and uplifted animals live on a space station, and Titan is being terraformed. Scott’s job has him covering up the evidence of failed experiments by decommissioning orbital labs that were damaged by the dangerous research they were performing. In the process, he uncovers a conspiracy: Earth is actually habitable, but the Corporation is keeping it secret so they can continue to keep humanity confined to the station and under their absolute control. Meanwhile, a rogue group of scientists is obsessed with creating antimatter because it will make them God or something, I don’t know, they cray-cray. Uncovering this leads the previously-loyal Scott to join a revolutionary conspiracy. Where will his new path lead him?

…Well, it’s going to lead to him going back in time a million years and dying on an alien planet on the other side of the galaxy. Duh. We already saw so at the beginning. That’s how stable time loops work. Way to take all the dramatic tension out of the story. The only narrative stakes, then, are what will happen to the other characters. Perhaps Scott made a noble sacrifice to save them all, resulting in a happy ending for everyone else even though he died in the process? Ha, ha, no; despite his best efforts, everyone dies. What a bleak and pointless story.

Shangri-La made for an utterly miserable read.

Final Rating: 1/5

Joe Carson’s Weapon

Project Gutenberg is a massive digital library of public domain works. Its archives contain not merely novels, but also numerous short stories from magazines with adjectives like “Amazing”, “Thrilling”, “Startling” and “Wondrous” in their titles. I’m making my way through its vast catalogue of these speculative fiction works. Today, I’ll be looking at “Joe Carson’s Weapon” by James R. Adams, published in Planet Stories in 1945.

Gutenberg Link

Joe Carson’s Weapon

SPOILERS BELOW

“Joe Carson’s Weapon” is a planned Martian invasion of Earth. However, the two Martian scouts sent ahead are a pair of bumbling fools who make a series of ludicrously contrived misunderstandings that see them conclude that humanity has developed an ultimate weapon in the form of jokes that kill the listener, and so they plan that the invading Martian fleet will broadcast jokes upon arrival. Hilarious, right?

Nothing hurts quite like a bad comedy. This story is trying to be funny, but completely failing to pull it off. The Martians may misunderstand the concepts of jokes to be something that inflict pain on the recipient; but believe me, I was in agony reading these attempts at humor. Just an excruciating read. Do yourself a favor and skip it.

Final Rating: 1/5

Escape Velocity

At twenty five thousand miles an hour you’re lighting up the sky. Hypersonic breakout from your last and future life. Relativistic calculations; distance, time and speed. A conscious and ballistic object, can you reach escape velocity? Let’s fly into the great unknown Escape Velocity, by Victor Manibo.

Synopsis:

Space Habitat Altaire is the premier luxury resort in low Earth orbit, playground of the privileged and the perfect location to host reunions for the Rochford Institute. Rochford boasts only the best: the wealthiest, most promising students with the most impressive pedigrees. Complete with space walks, these lavish reunions are a prime opportunity for alumni to jockey for power with old friends and rivals—and crucially, to advance their applications to live in an exclusive Mars settlement. Earth is dying, and only the best deserve to save themselves.

Aboard the Altaire for a 25th reunion, finance magnate Ava pursues the truth about her brother’s murder during their senior year. Laz, ambassador and political scion, hopes to finally win Ava’s heart. Sloane, collecting secrets to conceal his family’s decline, angles for a key client. And Henry, heir to a healthcare empire, creates an unorthodox opportunity to get to Mars in a last-ditch effort to outrun a childhood secret.

While these erstwhile friends settle scores and rack up points, they fail to notice the other agendas developing at the Space Habitat Altaire. Their own futures aren’t the only ones at stake—“the best” will soon regret underestimating those they would leave behind on Earth.

Source: Goodreads

SPOILERS BELOW

Escape Velocity follows a group of four former friends visiting a space station for a class reunion. Each is pursuing a secret agenda: Ava wants to learn the truth about her brother’s murder 25 years ago; Laz wants to win Ava’s heart; Sloane needs money; and Henry wants to make a backroom deal to get on the list of those headed to a Mars colony despite not meeting the requirements. However, the staff have a secret agenda of their own – to strike the first blow in a violent revolution.

This book lost me right from the start, when the first few chapters were an achronological mess. We begin with Henry dying in space for the first chapter, then the second flashes back to an unspecified amount of time earlier when the characters first arrived on the station, then the third flashes back 25 years more to their school days, then the fourth is an in-universe magazine article that was published in the year 2084 – which is not the year that the story is set, as it mentions that the space station is still under construction. Assuming, of course, that “the year the story is set” can have any meaning when we’re ping-ponging to a different time period every chapter.

Another problem is that the characters are all very unpleasant. The only one I found sympathetic was Ava, as she’s the only one who wasn’t involved in Ashwin’s murder, or covering up Ashwin’s murder, or Coen’s murder, or covering up Coen’s murder, or whatever the hell it was that Sloane was doing. Which, given the revolution plotline, the fact that they’re unsympathetic may be the point – but, you know, that doesn’t make it any more pleasant to have to spend all these pages reading about them.

Since Ava was the only one of the main characters I found sympathetic, I was hoping that she would survive. But no, she dies. And that means I have to hand out a Dead Lesbian Penalty for her, as she was previously in a relationship with a woman, Daniela. Heck, I might as well hand out one for Daniela, too – normally I say that backstory deaths don’t count, but how do you even define that when the plot is so untethered from time? A fair number of the chapters as set in the “25 years ago” period, when she’s alive, and one of them covers her death; that’s good (bad) enough for me. Well, not like it’s gonna affect the book’s grade, as my scores don’t go below 1.

Escape Velocity was a very confusing time with very unpleasant people, and I didn’t enjoy it at all.

Final Rating: 1/5

Freudian Slip

Project Gutenberg is a massive digital library of public domain works. Its archives contain not merely novels, but also numerous short stories from magazines with adjectives like “Amazing”, “Thrilling”, “Startling” and “Wondrous” in their titles. I’m making my way through its vast catalogue of these speculative fiction works. Today, I’ll be looking at “Freudian Slip” by Franklin Abel, published in Galaxy Science Fiction in 1952.

Gutenberg Link

Freudian Slip

SPOILERS BELOW

“Freudian Slip” sees large portions of the world suddenly disappear, replaced by a starry void that people can’t force themselves to acknowledge. The protagonist is Herman, a psychoanalyst who is abducted by some beings who ask for his help in solving the problem: the world is actually a mental construct, they say; and Primus, the one responsible for maintaining it, has suddenly been struck by amnesia, resulting in large portions of it disappearing. Herman points out that he is completely unqualified, as he works on human minds and Primus is fundamentally inhuman; but by the miracle of plot convenience, everything works out. You see, Herman is (groan) a Freudian psychologist, and Primus’s problems are due to sexual inhibition (whatever that means for whatever type of being he is), and Herman talking him into getting over it restores the world – only everything is now suddenly much raunchier now that Primus is sexually uninhibited. Wonderful.

This story had a good hook with the premise of something mysterious happening to the Earth, but everything went rapidly downhill from there. The metaphysical thing of what we perceive as reality being the process of another being’s consciousness maybe had some potential, if explored in an interesting way, but Freudian psychology was definitely not the way to go, and I could only groan at how the story ended up playing out. A major miss, for sure.

Final Rating: 1/5

Kairos

So what if you can see the darkest side of me? No one would ever change this animal I have become. Help me believe it’s not the real me. Somebody help me tame this animal. Let’s escape into Kairos, by Ulysse Malassagne and translated by Anne and Owen Smith.

Synopsis:

In Kairos, French graphic novelist Ulysse Malassagne turns the typical damsel-in-distress narrative on its head. With stunning art, epic battle scenes, and unexpected plot twists, Kairos forces you to question where to draw the line between hero and antihero.

Nills and Anaelle are looking forward to their first night in their rustic cabin in the woods. But the couple’s idyllic vacation is suddenly thrown into turmoil when a strange flash of light bursts from the fireplace. A portal appears, and out of it spill dragon-like creatures that are armed to the teeth. They grab Anaelle and flee back through the portal, leaving a distraught Nills with a sudden decision: stay behind, or leap through after her?

He leaps. And that’s when things get really weird.

Source: Goodreads

SPOILERS BELOW

Kairos, originally published in French under the title Kairos-Intégrale, is the story of Nills, who is taking a vacation with his girlfriend Anaelle when lizard creatures (the story calls them dragons, but they look more lizard-like to me) suddenly appear and abduct her through a magic portal. Nills jumps through after them and sets out on a quest to rescue her, but his time is limited: humans who come to the dragon world end up transforming into monsters and eventually dying.

The synopsis claims that this story “turns the typical damsel-in-distress narrative on its head” and “forces you to question where to draw the line between hero and antihero”. To which I say… no, not really? Anaelle really does spend the whole story as a damsel in distress: the fact that she and Nills break up at the end doesn’t change that. And despite his body physically becoming more monstrous, Nills seemed pretty solidly on the side of justice to me. It’s not like the antagonists turn out to actually be good, decent people outside of kidnapping Anaelle just this one time; it’s made clear that they’re a tyrannical monarchy subjugating the people, and a long-gestating revolution of the oppressed populace rallies behind Nills as a figurehead. When Elea was guiding Nills to the throne, I kept expecting that this was where the dark turn was going to come, that he was going to abandon her to the guards in his mindless pursuit of his goal, thus demonstrating that his obsession was blinding him to common decency – but no, he cared for and protected her the entire way. And when Anaelle makes it clear that they’re over as a couple, Nills doesn’t flip out like Kariya Matou from Fate/Zero or anything; he respects her agency and accepts her decision. Where exactly is the “anti-” supposed to come into it again? Because he seemed pretty solidly “hero” to me. As such, the story’s intended message fell flat for me, and I came away unsatisfied.

Kairos #1-3 are collected in Kairos.

Final Rating: 2/5

1,492,633 Marlon Brandos

Project Gutenberg is a massive digital library of public domain works. Its archives contain not merely novels, but also numerous short stories from magazines with adjectives like “Amazing”, “Thrilling”, “Startling” and “Wondrous” in their titles. I’m making my way through its vast catalogue of these speculative fiction works. Today, I’ll be looking at “1,492,633 Marlon Brandos” by Vance Aandahl, published in Worlds of IF Science Fiction in 1962.

Gutenberg Link

1,492,633 Marlon Brandos

SPOILERS BELOW

At 3:00 AM in an unnamed city, all of the men suddenly become restless and leave their homes, while the narration describes various aspects of them (the look in their eyes, their smiles, the motion of their hands) as being reminiscent of Marlon Brando. They all gather in front of the house of a woman, Dorothy, until her father disapprovingly sends them all home. The next day, most of them have forgotten the experience; except one, who considers the experience a sound rebuttal of the principles of logical positivism (which Wikipedia informs me was a philosophical movement that argued that statements are only meaningful if they can be verified through empirical observation or are tautologically true by definition. You know: Moritz Schlick, Rudolf Carnap, Otto Neurath, Hans Hahn, Friedrich Waismann, Herbert Feigl, Hans Reichenbach, Carl Gustav Hempel, A. J. Ayer… they’re all just as much household names as Marlon Brando. No further explanation needed. …OK, I do know of Carl Gustav Hempel, but that’s only due to Umineko no Naku Koro Ni piquing my interest in the Hempel’s Raven paradox.)

…Just what is supposed to have happened in the story? The woman, Dorothy, has mind control powers which she used to temporarily turn every man in the city into her plaything? Or, no, her father took them away from her, so I guess he has mind control powers that he lent to her only to withdraw them when he realized how she was using them? Who exactly is her father supposed to be, to have this power? Is it a psychic ability, or a machine, or what? What does any of this have to do with logical positivism? Under LP, “beauty” is not meaningful because it is subjective rather than empirical, and Dorothy clearly has a preferred type, so, therefore, Q.E.D., apparently, I guess? I don’t know. This story made no sense. What a bunch of hooey.

Final Rating: 1/5

Anti-Ghost

Some people say you shouldn’t get too attached to the material world, it will never last. Some people say it will all go up in smoke. But until that fire burns, I’m gonna pal around with this ghost. Let’s spook Anti-Ghost, by Omutatsuikoto.

Synopsis:

One day, Toru, a young paranormal content creator, visits an abandoned hospital for research. What will this ghost skeptic encounter there…?!

Source: Anime Planet

SPOILERS BELOW

Anti-Ghost is about Toru, a content creator who produces fake paranormal videos. When commenters remark on his work become stale, uninspired, and unbelievable, he decides to go to an abandoned hospital to get ideas for his next video. There, he has his first genuine encounter with the supernatural: a girl trapped halfway in an old TV set who insists that she’s not quite a ghost, as she doesn’t remember ever dying, and a giant monster in the hallway. Discovering he’s trapped in the hospital, he makes a deal with the girl, Hikari, for them to work together to escape the hospital.

This was a decent one-shot. I actually wish it had been longer, as it had several twists which feel like they could have used more time to breathe. At its current length, they were just kind of rushed through without any time for the implications to sink in or any consequences to manifest. Still, the fact that I’m wishing there was more of it speaks to the strength of its premise: this was ultimately a good idea for a story, and I’m glad to have read it.

Anti-Ghost is fairly good.

Final Rating: 3/5

From an Unseen Censor

Project Gutenberg is a massive digital library of public domain works. Its archives contain not merely novels, but also numerous short stories from magazines with adjectives like “Amazing”, “Thrilling”, “Startling” and “Wondrous” in their titles. I’m making my way through its vast catalogue of these speculative fiction works. Today, I’ll be looking at “From an Unseen Censor” by Rosel George Brown, published in Galaxy Magazine in 1958.

Gutenberg Link

From an Unseen Censor

SPOILERS BELOW

In “From an Unseen Censor”, the protagonist’s Uncle Isadore has died. Instead of writing a will like a normal person, he set up a complicated puzzle that the protagonist has to solve in order to discover his hidden fortune. It involves trained alien Dodo birds and an altered version of Poe’s “The Raven”.

This was just needlessly overcomplicated. There wasn’t even a point to it – Isadore was just being an asshole and making the protagonist jump through hoops for no reason. No, I can’t say I liked it much.

Final Rating: 2/5

Lunita

Silver light, she turned her face up to the starlit sky and on this night began to wonder why she knew that soon the day would come. Born to be an heir of beauty and serenity, into this world she entered quietly. To her surprise, she was the one. Let’s reflect on Lunita, by Xavier Morell and Sergi San Julián.

Synopsis:

N/A

Source: Goodreads

SPOILERS BELOW

Lunita is about Summer Fillion, a DEA agent investigating the death of an ambassador in Barcelona from a strange drug. Known as Blue Tear, it turns out to be supernatural in nature, meaning Summer is out of her depth. Enter Lunita, a witch who claims to be the daughter of the Moon, who used to work for a government agency investigating paranormal cases until being forced out by corrupt superiors with their fingers in the drug trade. The two of them team up to prevent a war between humans and mermaids by rescuing the captured mermaid that the drug dealers are torturing to create Blue Tear.

This was a decent comic. The art was a little on the weaker side, with facial expressions in particular often feeling exaggerated to the point of caricature, but the story was strong enough that it wasn’t a dealbreaker for me. I liked the various fantastical creatures that appeared throughout the story and the complications caused by the drug cartel descending into infighting as soon as things started going bad for them. My biggest complaint is that, for all that the comic teased a romantic relationship between Summer and Lunita, they never ended up hooking up.

In the extra, the creators note that Lunita was born out of a failed series, G.E.I. Debut, which would have followed the paranormal investigation group that got broken up by corrupt government officials in the backstory of this one, but which was twice kneecapped by the companies contracted to publish it going out of business. There are definitely portions of this series that hint at it being part of a larger world – references to Lunita being just one of several Daughters of the Moon, living unaware of her siblings to due being shunned and outcast by her mother for some reason – and I would be happy to see a return to this world to further explore the characters and setting. Even so, I think what we get here is good enough to stand on its own as a decent self-contained story.

Lunita #1-4 are collected in Lunita.

Final Rating: 3/5